A New Beginning..........

Its weird, how I didn't use to get stress over my studies. I used to study because people said I have to, because I didn't want to disappoint my parents. But right now, I'm actually studying because I want to. Bad results, mediocre results, excellent results, it didn't use to matter.... (except that I had to face a little guilt each time I had to report to my parents about bad results) I wasn't once, affected by my grades, (but of course, good results always calls for celebration).

The day when O'level result was to be announced, everyone around me were excited, anxious, nervous, in jitters. But I didn't understand that heart-stopping anxiety, which almost everyone experienced (the BlackJack syndrome) -"take in a deep b-r-e-a-t-h-e, peep, cover, thn peep again at the result slip, & when they finally summon enough courage, they decide to just flip it over, and face what they have to, be it good or bad"- there & then.

So, now on to polytechnic - where it was supposed to be carefree, no stress - I start getting affected by my results. Even breaking down once for Compro. & the more I get affected, the more I feel I'm getting worse. I do hope to make my parents proud, to achieve beyond their expectations, but its getting increasingly difficult to do so. No, I am definitely not stressed out, or under huge pressure. I know very well that I'm not putting in much effort, hugging legs for every single test, or praying hard that it all turns out fine, I'm still doing so for my sem exams, ha, maybe, its time to become a different person.

Say hello, to future me! (: